My biggest concern (not blaming the lack of coffee) has been my endless inability to say what I want to about my work.
Over this past weekend, I had an incredibly thought provoking conversation with someone about the ability to talk about art. It seems, though we were talking about non-attachment and impermanence, that both of us felt that our abilities to really talk and write about what we do in photography is limited by many other forces. For me, these forces are timidness, and confusion about ambiguity in my own life, which come off as incoherence.
I'm sure that I am exaggerating on my lack of comfort that I felt about talking about my work today. I just really felt out of body in talking with peers. I am limited by this mental plague where I believe I must not sound preachy, nor must I sound too confident. Thus my feelings become introverted and I attack myself. This is not who I want to be.
It is time for me to move on in my work. I have shyed far away from the person I was when I began the work for Closer Than We Notice and thus I don't feel comfortable with talking about my work, for I feel as if I am talking about someone else's work, not my own. I thrive right now on interactions with other people when making photography, which sounds contradictory, but it's not. Whereas Closer only worked when I was photographing alone, I feel I need to interact more with other photographers and non-photographers when I work now. Because I use photography as a way of creating memories, I feel this is a good thing. I am in a passionate desire for memories with other people.
These are just ideas. Is it ok that I'm unsure?
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